I stifle a troublesome yawn
As my eyes greet the dawn -
I had been awake all night,
Day dreaming in the moonlight.

I saw your face, my dear
in the stars in the atmosphere -
The constellations shone,
And I did not feel alone.

This feeling of content bliss
Turned the world upon its axis.
It has been a long time it seems,
Since I allowed myself to dream.

They would lend themselves to fear,
And I would silence many a tear…
I worried and my edges were frayed -
I believed that nothing of me would stay.

But there is hope in my heart
That keeps me from falling apart.
There is peace I found tonight.
Everything will turn out alright.

I didn’t intend to
Fall into this world -
I picked up a pen
And cascaded into
The darkness of its
Ebony stained ink.
Words were thorny roses…
So bittersweet in their beauty.
They were rust on my tongue -
Metallic from drawing
crimson blood on my lips.
They danced on ivory skin,
Tracing the scars of war.
They lead me here,
Into a world of inky darkness
And blossoming roses
Stained crimson
From conception.

Your hands…
         Shaking…
Your soul…
         Aching…
Your heart…
          Breaking
Your body..
            Quaking.

Stop these decisions you’ve been making
Let go of the pills you’ve been taking.
Give me your hand
I understand
Life is too hard to take sometimes -
Let me soothe the bruises with gentle rhymes.
Let me mend what has fallen apart
Let me hold together your beating heart
I need you here,
Let me catch your tears.
Please don’t go too far away,
Let me be selfish and ask you to stay.

I am the blood in your veins
That yearns to end all of your pain.
Give me your wrist,
Just try to exist…
I don’t want to leave.
I don’t want to grieve.

Let me be your happiness, and none of pain.
Let me be your clear skies and clouds and rain.

Let me be the sun upon your skin
Helping you to feel warm again.
Let me braid roses in your hair
And replace all pain with love and care.
Let me be the moon, let me be that sun
Let me be the tether that won’t come undone.
Let me be the alchohol, let me be any drink…
Let me be the anchor that won’t let you sink.
Let me be the pill that does as it should -
Let me be the needle that only does good.

Make me into anything you need me to be-
Please oh please, just don’t become a memory.

You told me once
On a grey hued morning
that the birds sing
Only of their mourning.
You said their sorrow
Becomes a winter’s song,
And that they only sing
To become strong.

I laughed tiredly
and told you it was bittersweet.
These birds are beautiful,
But sigh in defeat.
You told me it was love
that helped them to fly.
I told you that wasn’t true,
for the birds only love the sky.

You told me once
on a blued afternoon
that you would be gone,
and I’d only have the moon.

I didn’t know what to say,
But I told you it was fine.
I begged you to leave quickly,
So long as the moon was mine.

You left during the night,
and the moon held my tears.
I never shed one for you,
Even as you disappeared.

I am stitched up during the night,
I am held together by its light -
And for moments, I am alright…
But the sun rises day after day,
Nothing in life is destined to stay.

I had given you all that I had,
And even still, you left.
You told me I ought to be glad,
But all I feel is bereft.

You had taken from me
My each and every memory,
And replaced them with grey.
Why couldn’t you stay?

I had flirted and fantasized with death
Until it became a reality.
It beheld a cold smile with a warm voice
That promised imortality.

The way a sun smolders upon green leaves reminds me of the way your eyes land upon mine - those Summer browns hold my Spring greens and I am lost in the beauty of passing time.

The way flowers and leaves dance in the wind to the Earth’s melody reminds me of the song my heart sang when your Sun-kissed skin bridged across the very gap of time and caressed my Winter-laced fingers. You became the center of my universe and I, ever hovering around you, witnessed the affection of gravity as it drew us together. Every Time your fingers entwined with mine, time halted for just a moment long enough to let our souls eclipse.

The way the moon liquefies the warring sea and leaves it a swirling purple-laced silver mirror reminds me of those moments when you sought out the cavernous craters within my soul and filled them with love, instead. I had allowed the sorrow to free itself from my rib cage and my heart beat to yours instead. The tears that fell were of happiness, and those sunny fingers danced upon my rosy cheeks as we cascaded eagerly into those Summer days that sang only of you.

The way the horizon beholds the sun leaves me jealous. It reminds me for the shortest of moments that you breathe for her, now. She caresses you and holds you in a way my own hands were not meant to. I gaze upon that zenith with a longing unbeknownst to me that a human could feel.

It is the way the wind seems to dance to you, and the trees seem to reach for you, and the way the warmth of the world is brought only by thoughts of you, that leaves me in a constant flux of bittersweetness.

I long for your light, but I exist without it. My soul has dimmed in order to caress the smoldering letters of your name that are seared on my heart. They shelter the vibrant golden letters, kissing them sweetly with darkness. The way your light still travels across the universe to find me and set me aglow with a caress as gentle as the sea itself tells me that my own name soars through your veins and perches alongside the flighty bird of your heart. I am in your ribcage, chirping so sweetly and tenderly. I make your blood sing and your mind reverberate with my song. You and I are both inescapable of one another - gravity and time are not purely mathematical any longer. They are affectionate of us, dear.

We are drawn together.
I wait with open arms until your Summer hands bridge across time to claim Winter once more.

The way you allow words to hang between the cavern of the universe to bind me to you… The way you leave that horizon behind and cascade into the pattern of our existence… The way the Earth turns and draws us closer together once again tells me that our time will come.

It is, my dear, the quiet nature of the universe that tells me that you love me, too.

Keep me singing, my love, and I will keep you breathing.

I will sing in your veins and you will smolder upon my heart as we dance through our equinox.

When I drink, my dear -
I cheers only to you.
Drinks raise and clink
And a lovely sound rings true.
When I drink,
I drink to you.

My lips go numb, love.
Frozen solid in time…
They form words I don’t understand,
And pour forth unbidden rhyme.
When I drink,
I drink to you.

Ice imbues my veins, honey,
And all I see is your face.
I fall in love with you again
And can’t escape this place.
When I drink,
I drink to you.

A buzz corrodes my being,
And your lips envelope mine.
Darling - I swear stars fall!
Such a feeling is divine~
When I drink,
I drink to you.

Fire corrodes my senses,
And all of me falls to your commanding queue.
You ignite my being, my love.
When I drink - I drink to you.

For in ice, comes a fire
That not even whiskey can expire.
It grows hotter by the minutes passed
And I utter a prayer to make it last -

When I drink,
I drink to love.
Glasses clink -
You’re all I dream of.

You were a winter storm,
Fresh from the orange Autumn days.
On blue hued wings,
You danced that starfire sword of ice
And stole the scarlets of my soul,
Leaving it a timberwolf grey.
I saw stars in the lightening of your eyes,
And I watched as they fell down your face.
Never have I been so cold, love.

Tell me that you don’t love me.
Set me free. Set me free. Set me free…

Make these thoughts cease.
Please, please, please….

Please don’t ask me to smile.
Please just let me hide away.
I will only linger for awhile,
And then, dear, I’ll fade away.

There’s a worry…
Ever present upon my bones.
It’s the unhindered truth -
I don’t want to die alone.

Amongst bravado
And half-hearted lies,
Hides a child in my soul, 
Silencing her unbidden cries.

She weeps,
And sheds many tears.
Smiling, she begs,
“Don’t leave me here”.

She can’t stay,
She knows that to be so.
So instead, she pleas,
“Remember me when I go”

There’s a truth,
Engraved upon my heart.
I want to be remembered
After my soul departs.

I didn’t mean to hide away -
My eyes opened wide
like a full moon,
appearing through the darkness,
that was previously hidden
behind clouds.
My soul roared like a candle flame
obliterating all sense of closeness -
the shadows echoed
the vast space and time between us,
and like a candle
my soul expired,
obliterating all sense of presence
completely.
Darkness encroached and obscured my figure.
You could no longer see me -
I was invisible.
I did not mean to disappear on you.
I saw how wonderful you were
and how you noticed my glow in the room.
So,
before you could witness my soul,
and feel the warmth of my heart,
I hid behind the clouds of night
and allowed myself to expire.

I did not mean to leave you.

Except that I did,
before you could leave me.

You told me once
That you loved me
You held my hand in the summertime
And we counted the stars at nighttime
You told me you loved me
As we watched an eclipse
But we never kissed
We were the two dandelions
Standing together
Full of unspoken wishes
Until the wind came
And blew you away
You told me you loved me once
When an unbidden
Secret poured from your heart
As a truth we could no longer keep quiet
When you left winter came
But I didn’t dance away on the wind
I froze
Solidified in snow
Encased in ice
Frozen in time
My pockets are empty
And this winter is everlasting
You told me you loved me once
But now I dont have anything left
Not even punctuation

I did not glance at the solar eclipse,
And I wince as the truth falls from my lips.
Something so beautiful could not stay.
And so, from it, I had turned sadly away.
I dove into a scene with my family -
I saw the flickering shadows as a memory.
I did not glance at the ring of fire,
For such a thing was destined to expire.
Instead, I glanced at that quivering mark
That shone and cindered upon a tree’s bark,
And I saw the gold contrast with black,
And I saw what every solid line could lack.
I saw the shadow fall to orangey hue,
And I saw the eclipse in the eyes of you.

I did not glance at the sun.
You were the only one
That I dared to glance on that fated day
When all naturality had fallen away,
And the moon and the sun joined once more
And created beauty more grand than ever before.
It was enough to spend it near you, dear.
I did not need to witness it to see the sun’s seer.
The ring of fire
May have expired,
But the light that shone in your eyes
was brighter than any could behold in the skies.
The gold shadows landed on your lips -
You were immortalized during that eclipse.